Goodbye

Dearest Banana,
I never thought I would ever have to write this. I knew I would, someday, but not so soon. Didn't we always bargain for 10 years? Then after your seizure last December, I renegotiated with you for eight. But you died last April 30, 2011, a Saturday, after we had visited your vet. You were 25 days short of your seventh birthday.
Sunny days still remind me of you, especially this time of year, your birthday month, when the days are long and bright and you would have loved to be in the sun, as yellow as the day, swimming in the ocean. We never did get to plan another trip to Anilao.
The days have gone on, and I have managed. But the sadness does creep up, especially in the early mornings when you would have awakened me, and we start the day with your walk. Kikay your baby sister is trying her best, but we all know she is not you. You had a five year headstart. We will work on making our own memories soon. But right now, we are mourning. I see it so clearly in her eyes sometimes, how much she misses you, it breaks my heart.
I have promised myself I would resume this blog for you. Maybe I will, one day, more actively. But right now, my Baby Girl, my life is dark and sad and I will mourn you.
Love,
Mommy